We’re Here to Help As an essential healthcare provider, We are open and supporting those in need of addiction treatment at all locations. Learn More. From creating attractive online dating profiles to attempting to decipher all the different signals someone is sending your way, dating is a dizzying experience. But then, you meet someone you connect with almost instantly. You like the same hobbies, have similar senses of humor and talk for hours at a time. Perfect, right? You just need to understand what it means to date someone in addiction recovery. In some cases, it started with an opioid prescription from a doctor after an injury or surgery that quickly spiraled out of control.
Advice on Dating in Recovery
This advice does not pertain to individuals who are already in relationships, only those who are unattached. One year can sound like a long time, especially for those who enjoy companionship. However, this wisdom is built on the experience of millions of recovering people. It can also take their attention away from the emotional, mental, and physical work required for a full and lasting recovery.
For example, some people seek out new relationships so they can enjoy the thrills of the honeymoon period. But, what happens when this year passes and you meet someone who is ready to date?
Here we will discuss what it’s like to date a recovering addict and how to approach the relationship in a healthy manner. The Experience of Dating.
While dating is hard enough, dating in recovery comes with even more added challenges. Tips for Dating in Recovery Dating as a recovering addict or alcoholic can be uncharted territory that you may be struggling to navigate. With so many added considerations, it can be difficult to know how to date sober and still enjoy yourself. To help, our Philly addiction treatment center is sharing a few tips on dating in recovery to make it easier.
Take Your Time Instead of jumping right into dating and a relationship, it is important that you take the time to work on yourself and focus on your needs. Recovery is a big transition with a lot of room for personal growth. Dating can cause you to feel vulnerable and expose you to new situations that can tempt you to start drinking or using again. While continued therapy, support groups, or treatment of some kind is recommended anyway, doing so when you are first dating in recovery especially can help you overcome any temptations and help keep you on track.
Dating in Recovery: When Do You Know You’re Ready?
At first glance, the person across the table looks amazing, has a great personality, and offers several qualities that you find attractive in a partner. But then, a discussion of addiction comes up, and from there, a little bit of anxiety may set in. Dating a recovering addict isn’t out of the question, but it helps to go into the situation well aware of the special circumstances that are going to surround the relationship.
Why You Should Wait One Year to Start Dating in Recovery. Many experts in addiction treatment strongly encourage their clients to wait at least.
Going through addiction and entering treatment will significantly change your world view, so everyday human social interactions are also bound to be approached differently in recovery, especially something like dating. During treatment, you worked on understanding how to hone your coping skills to help rebuild your life, and you are still working on those aspects every day in recovery. This can open you up to ideas of dating or connecting with others in a new way.
So far, you have been trying to surround yourself with only positive and encouraging people, and when presented the opportunity to date someone who fits this description, you may be tempted to jump right in. However, entering a romantic relationship should be a deliberate decision, not an impulsive one. Keeping your priorities straight and remaining committed to them can help you from rushing into something that can lead to emotional turmoil, compromising your recovery journey.
It will usually come down to the healthy coping skills learned in counseling and any additional personal work in therapy. Knowing your self-worth before stepping out into the dating arena is important to finding and selecting a partner that best suits you. Instead of choosing a meeting point that may put you at risk, suggest something that aligns with your recovery instead, like a healthy hobby or activity you enjoy.
Depending on how you choose to handle your substance use disorder recovery process, approaching this discussion can be handled many different ways. Transparency in a relationship can keep it healthy and honest, which is something to strive for when stepping into the dating world.
Dating in Early Recovery
Romantic meals, going out on the town, and making a toast at dinner can all still be done without alcohol or drugs. For the close to 25 million Americans in recovery of some sort almost 10 percent of the country , wine, weed, pills, or powders are not on the menu. The first step is to accept real facts and to surrender to them:. Chemical addiction is a brain-based disease. Chemical dependence is a chronic, relapsing disease that requires changes in behavior.
For many, this means dating. But is looking for a new relationship, or just playing the field, in early recovery a wise thing to do? As with any other aspect of addiction and recovery, everyone is different. That means you may not be in the best place to judge who would be a suitable partner. A break-up can trigger anger or depression, which can prompt you to want desperately to self-medicate. Remember that your number-one priority is getting well and you need to focus on yourself for this period.
What is it Like Dating Someone in Recovery?
Learning to feel emotions again, including positive feelings of love and intimacy, can be one of the most challenging parts of recovery, but also one of the most rewarding. Most recovering addicts have a long history of dysfunctional and destructive relationships. Early in recovery, relationships are one of the leading causes of relapse.
Relationships are complex. Here are some tips to get you started on the road to a healthy relationship with a recovering addict.
Focus on getting to know each other as people before rushing into a physically intimate relationship. It takes time for the brain and body to adjust to living a sober life. You can be a source of love, encouragement, and support, but the decision to remain in recovery belongs to your partner alone. If your attraction is based on a desire to rescue someone in need, you may be suffering from codependency. This condition is characterized by an excessive emotional, physical, and psychological reliance on another person to boost your own self-esteem.
Codependent relationships are not healthy for either partner. People in recovery often have a number of challenging issues in their past. To be a supportive partner, you need to have a solid understanding of substance abuse and recovery. Visit sites such as DrugAbuse.
Dating in Recovery: Are You Ready?
Are you falling for a recovering addict? Are you curious to know more? Keep reading to learn the truth about addiction and what questions to ask before you start dating a recovering addict. Most of the time, the will to get better is not enough for a person to enter into a state of recovery.
Fortunately, dating without the use of drugs and alcohol is possible. Julie Banter is a recovering alcoholic and a Recovery Support Specialist at our women’s.
Many men who are working to maintain sexual purity are single men. Not true. For single men it is imperative that they work their recovery and have support or even a sponsor as they continue to grow stronger in their recovery. Two main components of recovery are 1 accountability and 2 the deep work required to work through the issues behind your sexual purity struggles. Accountability is one of the most important tools in recovery. You should be faithfully attending meetings and connecting with an accountability partner or sponsor who is willing to have difficult conversations with you and will ask specific and hard questions.
Men grow stronger in the company of men who are seeking recovery.
Dating and Courtship in Recovery
Not only does my community recreationally use substances more than our straight counterparts, but our rates of drug and alcohol dependence are also higher. It can be challenging to navigate the gay dating scene if the sober you is ready for a romantic relationship. Wait one year from the date of your last time drinking or using. This is the general rule offered by AAs, NAs, therapists, recovery coaches and everyone else with relevant experience. Your first year recovering from substance use disorder needs to be dedicated to you and your recovery.
Now is the time to focus on you and build a solid foundation for long-term recovery.
Navigating the dating scene is hard enough. For those of us in recovery, we have a few added stresses, like trying to figure out when to tell someone we’re in.
When you first start dating in recovery, it is normal to feel completely scared and confused — after all, where is all that liquid courage? Here we take you through the best steps to getting back out on the scene while ensuring that you do not relapse in the process. Dating in addiction recovery can often lead to relapse if you are not ready for what lies ahead. From the abundance of strong emotions at the beginning of a relationship, to the emotional turmoil experienced during a breakup, dating can often cause a person to put their recovery on the back burner, or worse — experience a relapse.
This is why it is often recommended that you wait at least a full year before starting to date in recovery. Many experts in addiction treatment strongly encourage their clients to wait at least one year before beginning a new relationship. The first year of addiction recovery is a vital time when your sobriety should be in the absolute forefront and will take all of your focus and energy. It is also a time when recovering addicts are starting to rediscover themselves.
The early stages of recovery are spent figuring out who you are without drugs and alcohol, rebuilding your own sense of self-worth and self-esteem, and re-learning how to cope with stressors of everyday life.